Damage Control: Losing a Friend to His New Girlfriend |

Nothing beats guy time. The sports, video games, beer, the girls, and some more beer keep you smiling day in and day out.

Just think about your last roommate: Mine was Brian, and man do I remember some good times! Playing Madden and Call of Duty, picking up gorgeous women at parties, and throwing back beers after a long day of classes were regular activities in our room.

Then: Brian got a girlfriend.

As the days went by I saw less and less of Brian, and eventually he wouldn’t even come back to the room to crash. There is no doubt about it, Brian was whipped. I’m writing this to tell you how to prevent yourself from suffering the same fate I did, nobody wants to lose their best friend.

STEP I: MAKE NICE

The most important thing, if you are to succeed, is to be friendly with your best friend’s girl. Just be open to her and include her once in a while when you guys have parties or movie nights, etc.

This will prepare things so later on it is not weird for her to be sharing time with you. Also, she feels that you guys like her and is in turn kinder to your homeboy for having “such sweet friends”. This will also enable her to sometimes encourage him to hang out with his guy friends.

STEP II: DISTRACTIONS

Same as us men need our guy time, women need girl time. How many times have you heard the phrase “girls night“? Exactly. So, heres the second phase of our diabolical plan. Have your main man introduce his girl to some of your good friends who also happen to be girls.

Have them both included in some of your more social activities like games, sports or drinking. Not immediately, but soon enough, they will become inseparable. Voila! You just freed up a good amount of chill time with your best friend since his wifey will probably be shopping or getting a manicure with her new fem friend.

STEP III: TOUCHDOWNS AND TITTIES

Well it doesn’t have to necessarily be these things, but the idea is to pick activities normally reserved only for guys. Popular things are poker nights, the big game, beer, video games, strip clubs, play a rough sport (football?), band practice, and golf. These simple activities solve one complex problem… get the girl out of the picture! Unless she’s the perfect girl (unlikely) then there will be certain things that guys love and girls just aren’t too fond of.

Rather than you or your buddy telling her she’s not welcome, she will opt out on her own! Free man time and no guilty conscience!

Those three things pretty much cover all you’ll need to know to keep your best friend, your best friend! The goal here is to prevent your best friend form having to say “It’s just guys tonight honey,” and set him up for a ton of temper from her later on. This strategy should work on the majority of girls, but some are crazier than others. Should you end up with one of these cases then either you will have to make him suffer the consequences and tell her he just doesn’t want to spend every waking minute with her, or your going to have to learn how to seperate him from his clingy, crazy no good girlfriend.