Piece it together!

We’ve all been there. You’re sitting in bed, the sun is coming up, you have a terrible headache, you pants are half-off, there’s a half-eaten pizza directly on top of your face, and you may have shit or pissed yourself but you’re too afraid to pull up the covers. What this means? You had an awesome night. But what’s the more pressing matter that you’re struggling to comprehend: What happened?

It’s a worrisome little moment that your brain has to deal with, and there are really no instructions for how to piece together a drunken night of debauchery. At least, there didn’t used to be, until the fine folks over at AskMen.com explained how to go through, step-by-step, and piece together a drunken night. For example, here’s one of the main things you should start focusing on as soon as your brain starts to collect itself:

Surroundings and clothing
Begin with a simple question: Where are you? Bed? Girlfriend’s bed? Mystery bed? Mystery hammock? Don’t panic if you don’t recognize the surroundings. Take stock of what you are wearing. That may lend some clues. If you’re wearing all of your clothes, that’s good. At least no public nudity charges have been filed. Swim trunks? That means you were lucid enough to swim. Naked? That could go either way. Check your clothes for stains — food, grease or blood. Check for smells. Is that cigarette smoke or gasoline? If your clothes are ripped or chewed, you may have gotten in a fight or scaled a fence into a junkyard with guard dogs.

Head on over the link to find out the other tips and then never have the mystery of the drunken night lurking over you ever again.

It’s going to happen at some point during your college experience. You’re going to be out at a bar or a party, get to talking to some ladies, the number of which will quickly dwindle down to one as the two of you hit it off, and you’re going to get hammered enough to end up either at your place or hers, for a night of passion, and then NEVER seeing each other again. This is just the way it goes. And it’s awesome.

Prep yourself

But while the whole thing about a one-night stand is how unpredictable they are, and the excitement that comes from just talking to someone and then banging them in a mere few hours, there are ways to kind of prepare for them. Think of an earthquake kit. No one exactly knows when The Big One is going to hit, but you can certainly do things that will help your changes once it does. One-night stands are the same way. Which is why today we’re highlighting this article from AskMen.com about how to prep yourself for a one-night stand. The primer goes through a number of scenarios that could happen on your way to one-night bliss.

For instance:

If you started getting busy on the way home
If you guys already began your sexual adventure in the car on the way to your place, then forget the music and once you open the door to your house, put her up against the wall and kiss her as though she’s water and you’ve been stuck on a desert for four years. Women love spontaneity, but don’t begin ravishing her right away.

Foreplay is important even if it may be the last time you ever see her (depending on how good it is, of course). Even if all you want to do is get busy, remember that this is your chance to be creative and take your time. Otherwise, how else is she going to describe you to her girlfriends tomorrow?

Head on over to check out the rest of the tips.

Job interviews. They’re going to be coming up shortly, and that’s a good sign. It is the first step in leaving the nest of college and your family, getting that job (which, honestly, probably won’t be the ideal job you want and will simply be another obstacle before you actually find what you enjoy doing), moving into your own place away from the drunken shenanigans of your college brethren, and actually starting your life. It’s a glorious time.

But, also, a terribly stressful one. There’s so much emphasis put on the actual job interview, that the interviewees start freaking out, now knowing what to say to their prospective employers, and then leave after sticking their foot directly in their mouths a half-dozen times.

Well, fear no more! The folks over at AskMen.com have put together a pretty basic, yet vital, guide to acing that interview you dread so much. For example:

2. a) Quit schmoozing on a high note: The George Costanza Rule
Far too often people will come in for a job interview and establish great banter, only to take it a beat too long, which leads to an awkward pause, which will be the last thing the interviewer will remember when they start asking you questions. If you happen to be killing the get-to-know-you chit-chat and you have the interviewer laughing his ass off, feel free to take that moment to segue to the interview. This goes double for the end-of-interview banter. If you once again have your interviewer in stitches laughing, or you say something that really impresses them, take the time to end right there and say: “I’ve really enjoyed this. Hopefully I’ll be talking to you guys soon.”

Makes sense to us. Head on over to the above link to check out the rest.

Every year around this time, the city of Los Angeles nearly shuts down for a weekend as every person with the means and budget to head off into to the desert to listen to a weekend of music at Coachella (and, most likely, also dabble in a few psychedelics, alcohol, and other forms of relaxing and mind-expanding aids). This year, that city shut-down has been expanded by TWO weekends of fun, food, and an insane amount of music. But don’t fret if you can’t make it out. (Or, if you’re like us, and just hate everything that has to do with the idea of a full weekend of having to rub bodies with smelly hipsters and their full hipsterdom.)

Coachella

Luckily, the folks over at AskMen.com went through the list of musicians at Coachella this year and have picked the best bands that you should pay attention to. And so we’re going to link to that piece today, to save you from feeling too angry or depressed that you can make it there this time out.

Our favorite band that is on this list of theirs, mind you:

M83

Should Muse’s histrionics prove too campy, or your proggy preferences too uncool, the M83 has the answer. With a sound as big as the universe, the band is made for wide-open spaces and is likely to top even Radiohead in the festival’s “most epic” stakes. Like those British masters, M83 combines electronic touches and washes to create heavily textured anthems that Coachella thrives on. Their fresh take on goth should appeal to fans of Interpol, The Cure and even Phoenix.

Definitely worth checking out. Head on over to the link above to check out the other bands, and then simply stay in this weekend, listen to them on your stereo, and laugh at the masses risking skin cancer and other forms of venereal diseases by rubbing shoulders with the gross masses in the desert.

Don't let it happen

We’ve all been there. You’ve been drinking, quite a few alcoholic beverages, and you just want to get some sleep. But because of the late hour, it being three or four in the morning, and you spending the last 8 days never once putting something of substance in your stomach, you are starving. So it’s only natural to try to get one last late night burrito, or some tacos from the local eatery, or a pizza, or even just some stuff that’s hanging around your fridge.

As anyone who’s done this enough knows, this is a terrible idea. Your stomach is not built for that kind of late night meal, especially after so much booze, and you will pay the price shortly. Which is why today, as a warning to all college students, we check out the fine folks over at AskMen.com as they go through a list of 10 foods to avoid before heading off into slumber, lest your sleep is full of terrible dreams, horrible gas and stomach pain, and you start packing on the pounds in no time. One of the ten to look out for:

No.5 Cereal
Mitt Romney loves a good bowl of cold cereal right before bed, but he might want to be careful which one he chooses or he won’t get the rest he needs.

Cereals often contain high amounts of refined sugar and are chock-full of carbohydrates. That might set you off on a bit of a spike and crash in your blood sugar levels, which is not the ideal way to put your body at peace before bedtime.

Instead of reaching for Lucky Charms or Fruit Loops, go for these best breakfast cereals. Those that are whole-grain and have low sugar will quench the craving but won’t keep you up.

Who knew? Head over to the above link for even more foods to get out of your system before hitting the hay.

We’ve all been there. You’re rushing around in between jobs, or parties, or various outdoor functions, and you simply forgot to eat. So you see a stand just sitting there on the corner, and it’s a hot dog, or a burrito, or a gyros, or some other street meat. And you plot down the 5 bucks or whatever, bite into it, and it is, right then and there, the greatest thing you have ever eaten in your life. That’s simply the way of the world for street food. It’s there for you when you’re desperate, so of course it’s going to be delicious.

Street foods!

It is the thing that binds all people from around the world. In every part of the world, they have food you can simply by from a tiny little push-cart, and in a lot of cases it’s just as delicious. And, actually, there’s a lot more delicious street food around the world than there are in America. You just have to know where to look. So today, we highlight this fact with a link to this article by AskMen.com about the best street foods around. And not just the normal tacos, burritos and hot dogs you’d get from anywhere. But the best street foods from around the world.

For example, this one. We’ve actually tried this one before and, well, he’s not wrong about it:

The Jamaican patty
Visit the stunning island of Jamaica, and you will rapidly find, as I did, that people fall into one of two rival camps when it comes to sourcing their favorite portable treat. Everyone is in full agreement that the spicy beef patty is the way to go, but people are capable of arguing all day about where you should buy them.

I met fierce proponents of the patties sold at both the Juicy Beef chain of fast food outlets and those offered by its competitor Tastee. I tried both, and all I can tell you is that I would happily offer up a limb or two for either one to be delivered to my door as I write this.

Bon appétit!

There’s a little joke in my circle of friends about the horrendous nature of my Passport photo. When we tried to travel to Europe a few years back, the travel agent that we had to show our Passports to actually spent a good 5-10 minutes simply LAUGHING at my photo, and then about 5 minutes composing herself through laughing tears before she could go on with her job. That, my friends, is a terrible Passport photo.

Don't be a sucker

While it didn’t exactly ruin any chances with this particular one (who, frankly, was in her 50s and not exactly on my agenda) it doesn’t change the fact that if the travel agent WAS attractive, I would have immediately blown it with the horribly photo. So immediately upon heading back to the U.S. I went right over to the Walgreen’s and had them take another photo for me. The results were so much better.

The point is, taking a bad Passport photo isn’t something that EVERYONE does. Yes, it’s not always the best of conditions when taking any of these government-mandated ID photos, but there are ways to kind of “game the system” to make it so you don’t look like a serial killer. So today, we head over to AskMen.com where they have an article up about the various ways you can actually take a good photo. For example:

Choose complementary colors

Bright, bold hues — particularly anything red, orange or yellow — can underscore imperfections in your skin. Cooler colors in the blue family and neutral tones will downplay everything you don’t want showing up in these snapshots.

Click the link for some more, and then you never have to worry about someone just LAUGHING IN YOUR FACE again. What joy!

It’s a question that strikes fear in the hearts of most underclassmen, and pretty much all upperclassmen: What do you want to do after school? How the hell do you answer something like that?

"Plastics"

At this point in your life, you’re worried more about actually getting to class, or knowing where the good parties are on the weekend, or that cute girl in your chemistry class. The LAST thing you’re worried about is just what you’re going to be doing five/ten/fifteen/the rest of your years from now. And the fact that you can barely commit to a girlfriend doesn’t bode well when you’re asked to commit to a single career for the rest of your life.

It’s just an enormous amount of pressure. So what do you do? How do you find out what you want to do in your life? What’s the solution? How is it that so many people seemed to have figured it out but you can’t get your act together?

Luckily, the folks over at AskMen.com have considered this and put together a 7-step process to discover what you want to do with your life. For instance, here is step 4:

No.4 Find A Role Model

I would have to say it was when I found out who George Lucas was and realized you could make movies for a living. I was probably about seven. I’m only 18 now, but it’s all I’ve wanted to do since.

This is but a start. Head over to the above link in order to figure out the other 6 steps, and then get moving. If only to give you some piece of mind when someone corners you in a party and asks that horribly annoying question.

Breaking up is hard to do

Breaks-ups are terrible. They’re long, drawn-out affairs where both parties know something is wrong with the relationship, that there’s a problem that just isn’t going to get fixed this time, but there’s still all sorts of feelings between the two individuals. There’s plenty to love still there, but it’s just not working, and it’s time to cut your losses. But even worse than the actual break-ups are relationships that just drag and drag and drag, relationships that are considerably broken with no hope for recovery, but it’s seemingly easier to stick with them that to actually go through the pain and anguish of a breakup.

Obviously, the latter example is much worse than the first.

So, if you’re in a broken relationship, then the only thing you can do is to man up and end it. That said, there are a few ways to make the pain and sadness that will accompany the end of the relationship a bit easier. There’s definitely a right and wrong way to end it. Which is why, today, we’re highlighting this article over at AskMen.com about the 7 tips that will make breaking up a little bit easier. For example:

No man should ever send a break-up text ever again

If you’ve lost that loving feeling, be courteous and tell her face-to-face. Phone calls and e-mail are fine for small talk, but this is a big issue. It’s natural to want as much distance as possible between you and her when you break the bad news, but in this case, fight your instincts and have the decency to say it to her face. The fact that you’re reading our seven breakup tips for a broken relationship tells us that you’re a bigger man than the guy who dials and dumps.

So click the link and get the tips that will make the horrible break-up to come a bit easier.